Wednesday, March 30, 2011

It's not easy being green

A green eco-nut lists 366 things she intends to do to become more green.

Good Lord! You would think that killing herself would've been quicker and easier:

http://greenasathistle.com/green-listed/

Some of the gems:

#92 Turning off my air-conditioning during the summer (does she leave it on in the winter?)

#75 Using matches instead of lighters (with the horrible phosphorous and sulpher compounds? and what does she use them for since I assume she doesn't smoke or, heaven forbid!, use a fireplace)

I guess she does light fires, isn't that a green no-no:

#343 Using real, leftover wood for fires instead of artificial ones

I would approve of these:

#96 Sleeping naked
#356 Going skinny dipping

if it weren't for these:

#98 Not having any more baths
#63 Switching to natural deodorant
#277 Not shaving my legs anymore

#49 Only local and fair-trade chocolate (She's from Ontario, how are the chocolate plantations in Canada)

#292 Using up my change at the cash register (Why is that green?)

#273 Keeping my addresses on my computer rather than buying a paper notebook (Save tree, but uses horrible electricity - oh no, maybe she should just memorize addresses)

#140 Only drinking organic hard liquor (what the hell is organic hard liquor?)

#162 No more gift cards unless they’re homemade from scrap paper (I don't think Amazon accepts those)

#61 Using stainless steel rather than non-stick frying pan (takes less time to heat up) (Yes, but takes more hot water to clean - oh no!)

#219 Only buying wooden hangers, preferably used (but doesn't that kill trees?)

#240 Setting my desktop wallpaper to black, which uses less energy (er, no, if you use an LCD it uses more energy.)

1 comment:

  1. Proving once again that greenies are far removed from how things actually work.

    Would we could ask her if she's only going to have natural orgasms instead of the artificial kind.

    In those famous words "what a maroon"

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