Wednesday, November 23, 2016
A Chicago politician seriously injured when he crashed his bike says the smash-up was no accident — it was a sick plot carried out by a “suicide bomber” squirrel hellbent on “revenge.”
Howard Brookins Jr., an alderman for the city’s 21st Ward, was biking along Cal-Sag Trail on Nov. 13 when a squirrel cut him off at the path, and got wrapped in the spokes, causing the alderman to flip over the handlebars.
Brookins Jr., 53, suffered a fractured skull, a broken nose and a handful of missing teeth, according to the Chicago Tribune.
But it was weeks before the accident when Brookins Jr. believes his fate was sealed.
That’s when he spoke out against the critters, denouncing Eastern gray squirrels as “aggressive” and accusing them for destroying the city’s garbage carts, costing taxpayers $300,000.
“It’s a pet peeve. It does invoke some giggles. But we are spending too much money on replacing garbage carts because the squirrels continue to eat through ’em,” Brookins said at a city council meeting on Oct. 21, according to the Sun Times.
After the accident, the alderman could only reach one conclusion: Squirrels were out to get him.
“I can think of no other reason for this squirrel’s actions than that it was like a suicide bomber, getting revenge,” Brookins Jr. told the Chicago Tribune.
Brookins Jr. expected to make a full recovery but will have to undergo several surgeries.
“First, I am okay and I have been recovering in the hospital since the accident. I will, however, require multiple surgeries to recover from damage to my face and upper body,” he wrote on Facebook.
“Please excuse my inability to attend the events I had promised, as my recovery will take some time. Although I am happy to correspond by phone and email for pressing matters, I cannot travel to and from events and provide you with the service you deserve until my treatment is complete and I have sufficiently recovered. Kindly contact my office to have a staff member answer questions or attend your event on my behalf.”
The squirrel wasn’t as lucky — it didn’t survive.