Amy Schumer promised oral sex in wedding vows
If her vows are any indication, Amy Schumer’s marriage to Chris Fischer will be entertaining.
The 36-year-old comedian opened up about tying the knot and her first few weeks of wedded bliss by recounting the details of her big day on the Sirius XM show “You Up with Nikki Glaser,” reports E! News.
Speaking of their vows, Schumer exclaimed, “Mine sucked! I thought mine were good, I wrote mine in like, 20 minutes. I was crying when I wrote them, but his blew me out of the water so hard.”
“In my vows I go, ‘But I promise I’ll keep going down on you, even though everyone tells me I won’t,’” she chuckled. “And his were like, heckling me too. He was like, ‘The other day I lost a tennis match and you called me a f–king loser.’ It was all like awful s–t.”
So far, things have been great between the couple, who tied the knot on Feb. 13 in a secret ceremony.
“It feels f–king good!” Schumer shouted. “I’m a wife as hell. But it’s like a novelty. Somebody went to sit next to [Chris] and he’s like, ‘My wife is sitting here,’ and then I got back and he was excited to tell me that he said that. I just have been really overusing it to a degree that’s insane. Like, when it’s completely uncalled for.”
And while being married may make Schumer pretty happy, she’ll miss a few things about the single life, like casual late-night romps.
“I’ve been thinking of certain things … This show is called ‘You Up,’ right? I don’t think I’ll ever get a text like that again,” she quipped. “You know what I mean? And that made me really happy, but also really sad.”
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