Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Protips for increased dictator longevity

The folks at Cold Equations provide a handy little table for dictators:

CountryPrior relations with the USNuclear weapons programUS treatment of countryStatus of leader
EgyptAlliedNot significantPressured ally to step downPermanent vacation
LibyaModerately warm lately, despite past difficultiesAbandoned under US pressureBombs awayProbably on his way out
SyriaStrained to hostileNot a lot of info, probably has some programMild economic sanctionsLife is sweet
Iran"America is the Great Satan"Probably going to join the nuclear club soonIneffectual, intermittent saber-rattlingHappy as a clam
North KoreaHostileHas some nukes, ICBMs are in the worksIneffectual sanctions, endless talks, unkind portrayal in 2004 movie "Team America: World Police"You know what sucks about being Kim Il-Jong? Nothing.

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